stcculky | Entries tagged with fictives

Here's the full list of alters.
UPDATED FEB 20, 2024 BY ROSIE

HOST/ORIGINAL ONE THAT WAS HERE FIRST
Marlo, he/him

BRAINMADE, NOT INCLUDING SEGMENTS
-Thalia (the H is silent), she/her
-I don't know her name but Thalia's daughter. I think it's Serenity or something? She/her.
-Azrael
-Hua Xing (our Genshin OC)
-"TARDIS" he has no name but we nicknamed him that. (Homestuck OC)
-Unnamed new lady?

GENSHIN FICTIVES
-Itto
-Gorou
-Tighnari
-Cyno
-Dottore
-Capitano
-Pantalone
-Katsunori (scara duplicate)
-Kazuki (scara duplicate again)
-Kuni (scara duplicate but different time period)
-Klee
-Childe
-Mona
-Razor
-Bennett
-Fischl
-Xingqiu
-Morax/Zhongli
-Kusanali
-Furina
-Venti/Barbatos
-Albedo
-Alhaitham
-Ayaka
-Ei
-Lynette
-Freminet
-Wriothesley
-Navia
-Zephyr (A Dottore triplicate)
-Collei

ADVENTURE TIME/FIONNA AND CAKE FICTIVES
-Simon
-Prismo
-Marshall Lee
-Finn

RESIDENT EVIL FICTIVES
-Leon S. Kennedy (me)
-Luis Serra (probably leaving soon.)
-Ashley Graham

DOTTORE'S SEGMENTS
-Mirak
-Arlan
-Abaddon
-Omicron
-Lambda
-Psi
-Yaretzi
-Dolce
-Cyrus
-Silas
-Kane
-Fenix
-Zeta
-Azzie
-Sterling
-Jupiter
-Ebony
-29
-Rune
-Ceres (Kind of counts as a segment?)
-Koda
-Hades
-Cherie
-Eta
-Zarin
-Lorelei
-Callisto
-Negin
-Virgil
-Eta
-Chartreuse
-Unnamed

OTHER SEGMENTS
-Bea
-Pierrette
-Evangeline
-Idris
-Adonis
-Unnamed one?
-Other unnamed one?

TRIGUN FICTIVES
-Vash the Stampede
-Nicholas Wolfwood

HOMESTUCK
-Karkat Vantas
-Nepeta Leijon
-Terezi Pyrope
-Gamzee Makara
-Equius Zahhak
-Eridan Ampora
-Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde Harley (Technically Homestuck, but shes from ^2 Beyond Canon
-Dirk Strider
-Dave Strider
-Rose Lalonde

Hazbin Hotel
-Charlie
-Vox
-Rosie
-Lucifer
-AngelDust (Angie)
-Niffty

OTHERS
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Cyno and Tighnari's baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Dottore's baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-NOT NAMED FOR PRIVACY (Moraxs baby)
-Dipper Pines (Gravity Falls)
-Sigma (BSD)
-Aventurine (Honkai Star Rail)
-Kedamono (Popee the Performer)
-The gal herself, POPEE!!!!!! (Popee the Performer)
-Link (LOZ, specifically TOTK but kinda also all of the games)
-Sunny (Omori)
-Dazai (BSD)
-Scott Pilgrim (SPVTW)
-Adrien (is that how you spell his name???) (Miraculous)
-Tom (Eddsworld)
-Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)
-(UNNAMED FOR PRIVACY) (Baby)

Okay yeah I think that's it.

Current Mood: scared

Back in September (I think), I was frontstuck for a while. While frontstuck I made some horrible decisions, which resulted in a lot of stuff that I wont get into for triggering reasons and also just general privacy. Because of that incident, I was arguing with Max's mom a lot. At one point, the arguments were about the system. She shamed us for not wanting to become a singlet again. I've been thinking about it a lot; so has Max. We've decided since then not to try integrating, because it's all honestly so confusing and overwhelming and Max shouldn't have to make that decision at such a young age.I'd say integration is something for future Max to worry about, when his brain is fully developed and all that. It's just been on my mind, idk. Worries me in a way I can't really explain, but I'd say that worry is understandable. Sorry for ranting on here so much, I've just been kinda sad recently. Idk.

-Popee

Current Mood: icky
Current Location: window
Current Music: Cbat

I've been fronting almost constantly for like a week? Two weeks? Honestly I cant tell anymore, which I'll admit isnt great. It's been rough for me, too. Only a couple days ago I realized I may or may not(to put it simply,) have daddy issues, with him abandoning me for most of my life in my source (and when he is there... If you've watched my source, you know what he's like.) I'm mostly surprised that I JUST realized it, after being here almost for an entire year.
That's another thing that I guess has been on my mind. I've been in the system for almost a YEAR. 365 days. 8760 hours. also apparently 3.154e+7 seconds, whatever that even means?? I'm glad that I'm here, but it's kind of crazy. I was one of the first alters to form after Max realized there was any alters at all. I was one of the first of my original 'group' of alters, and now I'm the last left of that group. Somehow all of them went dormant, or the system reset, something like that; we still don't really know. And I went dormant too, but after ONE day of dormancy, I somehow managed to come back. I'm glad to still, you know, EXIST, but at the same time all of the others were gone and Max & I had to rebuild everything. That was a month ago, and I try not to be super obvious about it, but I'm still grieving. It's hard. It's hard to lose everyone, even yourself, and then by some miracle or something come back and find nothing. A wasteland. A wasteland with nobody else, nobody but your host. Your creator, you could say.

I don't know. This kind of got heavy, sorry if you read this stuff. That's all.

-Popee

Current Mood: depressed

So for a long time, I didn't believe shifting really worked. That was until my friend (

rottingshampoobottle) talked more and more about shifting, so I decided to try it. I used the Julia method (My previously mentioned friend suggested this method), wrote a script, and tried.

Attempt 1: EXTREMELY lucky first attempt. Felt a LOT of symptoms, I actually could tell I was basically on the verge of getting to my DR. And then I got the urge to open my eyes. They felt glued shut, and ofc I was worried about going to sleep and having my eyes glued shut. For about 25 minutes, I tried to ignore it, but after a while I couldn't anymore because I wasn't able to fall asleep. So I opened my eyes, gave up for the night, and went to sleep.

Attempt 2 (Last night): I feel like I should've taken a break before trying again, which I'm going to do this time, but whatever I tried anyways. I took melatonin so it'd be easier to fall asleep, however that melatonin was STRONG and kicked in very fast. I got to the counting part of the method, but I believe I only got to 40 before falling asleep. I also just couldn't relax very easily last night for some reason. So yeah, not super successful. But that's ok! I got lucky for my first attempt, that doesn't mean I'm gonna have attempts like that every time.

-Popee

Current Mood: bored
Current Location: Skewl still
Current Music: Soft Fuzzy Man - Lemon Demon

Just wanted to come on here and say sorry for not posting!! We got caught up w/ school stuff and other things over the weekend.

-Popee

Current Mood: bored
Current Location: skewl
Current Music: Girl Anachronism - The Dresden Dolls

We were just having a lockdown drill and all of us were cramped into a tiny closet in the dark and my friend literally couldnt stop giggling so hard and so loud and it was making me laugh and so i had to cover my ears so I couldnt hear them laughing. Also my other friend said "if someone farted right now everyone would laugh and we'd all die" which made it 10000x harder for me to not giggle

-popee

Current Mood: giggly

I haven't met a lot of them, but I really like the ones I have met. They're very nice! And it's weird (in a positive way) to show my achievements and have people say "Good job Hunter!", or "That looks really good!" Instead of being brushed off, or not being allowed to share my achievements at all (at least not my personal ones, more specifically related to hobbies.) I heavily appreciate them. It's nice to feel wanted and included. I don't know if any of you read this blog, although we've talked about the blog before, but if you do then hello! I appreciate you :)

-Hunter

Current Mood: happy
Current Location: hmmm

LOOSELY CONSIDERED A VENT.

Sometimes when I'm fronting, I imagine I'm in the castle. If nobody is around, sometimes I close my eyes when I'm walking down the hallway and it feels like I'm there. I miss it, but at the same time I don't, because of.. you know. Him. (And that whole way of life, honestly.) I know I technically was never there, but it feels like I was. It feels like I went to sleep, and the next morning I woke up here. I'm adjusting, and I'd say I'm doing well, but it's kind of hard. I feel almost guilty in a way for wanting to be there. I guess I just miss having a purpose and working for somebody? Even if that somebody turned out to be evil. It was nice to be busy most of the time, not having anything to do isn't the best. I thrive on being busy and productive. Not having to do anything is weird.

I'll leave it off there, I guess. Thank you for reading, if you did.

-Hunter

Current Location: yes

Hello! I'm going to be putting our Carrds here.
Note: The full system carrd isn't as good as my personal one because for mine, I watched a tutorial.

https://chshdfdshd.carrd.co/
https://monachipsissystem.carrd.co/

Not sure if the links will work. If they dont, you can probably just type them in or copy/paste them.

-Hunter

Current Location: utah

Been fronting since last night. I made us a carrd (that took way longer than it should've since I dont get human technology. At all.), changed our profile pictures on everything we have on our school computer, drew for a while, deep cleaned + organized the bathroom, made a couple playlists, aaand now I have nothing to do. It's weird to be expecting somebody to put you into a routine and give you commands but nobody ever does it. I guess that's just what I'm used to. It's nice to not have to live that way, but at the same time, life gets very boring very fast. Oh well. I'm managing.

-Hunter

Current Mood: bored
Current Location: yes

This is probably going to turn into a rant, but oh well.

Being a fictive kind of sucks- at least, when people know you exist, it does. A lot of people see fictives as somebody roleplaying a character they like, instead of somebody who IS that character. While technically, fictives aren't their source, we are still ourselves, not a roleplayer. Most people aren't familiar with fictives, or how they work, or even plurality in general. I understand that. But it's very unfortunate that sometimes I have to pretend to be somebody else because I know whoever I'm around would probably see me as a roleplayer instead of a person. I am a person. This is not a roleplay. I really exist.

What's more upsetting (more of annoying in my personal experience, but you get what I mean) is that some people aren't open to learning anything about fictives, nor systems in general. Of course, I don't want to force somebody to do hours of research or anything, but I do wish they would maybe ask questions about it if they were confused (which most people are, since systems aren't really talked about as much as they should be and things like that.) For example, one of Max's friends (who I talk to a lot, but she doesn't know it's me. She doesnt seem comfortable with our system because she is extremely uneducated about plurals.) who I'll call _, for the sake of privacy, and I got into a small debate about her refusal to learn anything about DID. Her argument was "Do I really have to learn about all of my friends disorders?" Which I understand not wanting to do, however the system does somewhat affect her too. Not as much as it affects us, (us = the system) however it still affects her. She has to be around us every day, wouldn't it be easier for everyone if she understood at least a little bit how it works?

I don't know, I don't have the energy to finish this right now. I guess I'll leave it off here for now. I'm sorry this turned into more of a rant that became more about alters in general instead of the actual topic of fictives, but oh well. I got carried away.

-Popee

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Location: a place on earth