stcculky: (Default)
Sooooo hi! also before i say anything else Im gonna clarify that this is Itto, not Max, but I dont have an icon thingy yet so erm yeah

i'll let yall know ab me even though nobody reads our posts unfortunately:
Im arataki itto (or js itto preferably) and if you cant tell im a fictive of, of course, arataki itto from Genshin Impact. Yeah, one of the alters (popee) is a genshin player. ew (I say this jokingly obv)
I use he/him prns n im gay (currently dating another alter so thats cool!!!!!!!) uhhhhhhh I dont have much else to say that isnt about my source tbh. I like beetles, is that something???? maybe it is idfk. I also LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVe LOVE LOVE LOVE tyler the creator so erm yeah. oh also technically doesnt matter here for obvious reasons, but I'm an Oni so yeah !!!


-arataki itto !!!!!
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
sorry for not posting, anyways omg. My MLP hyperfixation is coming back. I've already started drawing ponies again and I'm gonna redesign my old pony OC fruitcake (he was honestly just my shitpost pony OC i made as a joke about heavy gay stereotypes. Yes, he is an extreme gay stereotype.) Might give him a use, yk? Cause why not tbh.





-popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
Accidentall manifested a tornado with my friend today. On the bus, me and my friend both happened to be thinking "Wouldn't it be crazy if we had a surprise hurricane or tornado??" Long story short, TORNADO WARNING only a few hours later. Continued class for maybe 5-10 minutes, and then the principal came onto the announcements and said we were going to go into out severe weather procedures. Sat in the gym and drew in my friends sketchbook for 15-20 minutes, then ended up going back to class.

Nice to know I have the power to manifest a whole tornado!

-popee

!!!

Jan. 23rd, 2023 10:30 am
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
It's official !! I am 100% a girl. After MONTHS and monthsandmonthsandmonths of gender confusion and dysphoria, I've finally figured my shit out :) I'm now going to be using exclusively She/They, so no more calling me he please !!

-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
Back in September (I think), I was frontstuck for a while. While frontstuck I made some horrible decisions, which resulted in a lot of stuff that I wont get into for triggering reasons and also just general privacy. Because of that incident, I was arguing with Max's mom a lot. At one point, the arguments were about the system. She shamed us for not wanting to become a singlet again. I've been thinking about it a lot; so has Max. We've decided since then not to try integrating, because it's all honestly so confusing and overwhelming and Max shouldn't have to make that decision at such a young age.I'd say integration is something for future Max to worry about, when his brain is fully developed and all that. It's just been on my mind, idk. Worries me in a way I can't really explain, but I'd say that worry is understandable. Sorry for ranting on here so much, I've just been kinda sad recently. Idk.

-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
I've been fronting almost constantly for like a week? Two weeks? Honestly I cant tell anymore, which I'll admit isnt great. It's been rough for me, too. Only a couple days ago I realized I may or may not(to put it simply,) have daddy issues, with him abandoning me for most of my life in my source (and when he is there... If you've watched my source, you know what he's like.) I'm mostly surprised that I JUST realized it, after being here almost for an entire year.
That's another thing that I guess has been on my mind. I've been in the system for almost a YEAR. 365 days. 8760 hours. also apparently 3.154e+7 seconds, whatever that even means?? I'm glad that I'm here, but it's kind of crazy. I was one of the first alters to form after Max realized there was any alters at all. I was one of the first of my original 'group' of alters, and now I'm the last left of that group. Somehow all of them went dormant, or the system reset, something like that; we still don't really know. And I went dormant too, but after ONE day of dormancy, I somehow managed to come back. I'm glad to still, you know, EXIST, but at the same time all of the others were gone and Max & I had to rebuild everything. That was a month ago, and I try not to be super obvious about it, but I'm still grieving. It's hard. It's hard to lose everyone, even yourself, and then by some miracle or something come back and find nothing. A wasteland. A wasteland with nobody else, nobody but your host. Your creator, you could say.

I don't know. This kind of got heavy, sorry if you read this stuff. That's all.

-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
I feel very accomplished right now!! In Soc. Studies, we had to do quizizz and stuff on what we're learning about. In the study folder, there was an answer key for our review sheet. (She didn't make us do the review sheet because there was a lot going on last week.) She put the answers on it in blue, so I decided to study and hide the answers by highlighting them in that same blue and removing the highlight as I answered the questions. It works pretty well!! Since I only had about 30 minutes left in class by the time I started studying, I didn't take any breaks but if I had more time than I would've. I already know most of the material, so I'm not sure why I decided to study something I assumed I'd get a good grade on, but I did anyways and it made me feel good about myself. Just felt like sharing!

-Popee

Shifting

Jan. 17th, 2023 11:07 am
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
So for a long time, I didn't believe shifting really worked. That was until my friend ([personal profile] rottingshampoobottle) talked more and more about shifting, so I decided to try it. I used the Julia method (My previously mentioned friend suggested this method), wrote a script, and tried.

Attempt 1: EXTREMELY lucky first attempt. Felt a LOT of symptoms, I actually could tell I was basically on the verge of getting to my DR. And then I got the urge to open my eyes. They felt glued shut, and ofc I was worried about going to sleep and having my eyes glued shut. For about 25 minutes, I tried to ignore it, but after a while I couldn't anymore because I wasn't able to fall asleep. So I opened my eyes, gave up for the night, and went to sleep.

Attempt 2 (Last night): I feel like I should've taken a break before trying again, which I'm going to do this time, but whatever I tried anyways. I took melatonin so it'd be easier to fall asleep, however that melatonin was STRONG and kicked in very fast. I got to the counting part of the method, but I believe I only got to 40 before falling asleep. I also just couldn't relax very easily last night for some reason. So yeah, not super successful. But that's ok! I got lucky for my first attempt, that doesn't mean I'm gonna have attempts like that every time.

-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
Just wanted to come on here and say sorry for not posting!! We got caught up w/ school stuff and other things over the weekend.


-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
We were just having a lockdown drill and all of us were cramped into a tiny closet in the dark and my friend literally couldnt stop giggling so hard and so loud and it was making me laugh and so i had to cover my ears so I couldnt hear them laughing. Also my other friend said "if someone farted right now everyone would laugh and we'd all die" which made it 10000x harder for me to not giggle

-popee
stcculky: (hunter)
I haven't met a lot of them, but I really like the ones I have met. They're very nice! And it's weird (in a positive way) to show my achievements and have people say "Good job Hunter!", or "That looks really good!" Instead of being brushed off, or not being allowed to share my achievements at all (at least not my personal ones, more specifically related to hobbies.) I heavily appreciate them. It's nice to feel wanted and included. I don't know if any of you read this blog, although we've talked about the blog before, but if you do then hello! I appreciate you :)

-Hunter
stcculky: (hunter)
LOOSELY CONSIDERED A VENT.




Sometimes when I'm fronting, I imagine I'm in the castle. If nobody is around, sometimes I close my eyes when I'm walking down the hallway and it feels like I'm there. I miss it, but at the same time I don't, because of.. you know. Him. (And that whole way of life, honestly.) I know I technically was never there, but it feels like I was. It feels like I went to sleep, and the next morning I woke up here. I'm adjusting, and I'd say I'm doing well, but it's kind of hard. I feel almost guilty in a way for wanting to be there. I guess I just miss having a purpose and working for somebody? Even if that somebody turned out to be evil. It was nice to be busy most of the time, not having anything to do isn't the best. I thrive on being busy and productive. Not having to do anything is weird.

I'll leave it off there, I guess. Thank you for reading, if you did.

-Hunter

Carrds

Jan. 8th, 2023 03:08 pm
stcculky: (hunter)
Hello! I'm going to be putting our Carrds here.
Note: The full system carrd isn't as good as my personal one because for mine, I watched a tutorial.

https://chshdfdshd.carrd.co/
https://monachipsissystem.carrd.co/

Not sure if the links will work. If they dont, you can probably just type them in or copy/paste them.

-Hunter
stcculky: (hunter)
Been fronting since last night. I made us a carrd (that took way longer than it should've since I dont get human technology. At all.), changed our profile pictures on everything we have on our school computer, drew for a while, deep cleaned + organized the bathroom, made a couple playlists, aaand now I have nothing to do. It's weird to be expecting somebody to put you into a routine and give you commands but nobody ever does it. I guess that's just what I'm used to. It's nice to not have to live that way, but at the same time, life gets very boring very fast. Oh well. I'm managing.


-Hunter
stcculky: (Default)
omg. i typed out a whole thing for this post and it didnt save the draft. whatever anyways, I decided that our initial intro didn't give y'all much info on us, so I'm redoing it!

First of all, there's me, Max (Maxximus). I'm the host (kinda.???) I was the first one here so yay. I use He/him. Uhhh idk im an INTJ-T if that matters to you, also I'm a leo (very into astrology). I'm heavily spiritual but still trying to decipher my religion atm. I like Bojack Horseman, Angels Egg, Perfect Blue, Ginny&Georgia (kinda. it has its goofy moments.) and uhh idk what else. That's pretty much it though

Armesos is next I guess, he's ageless (but still technically counted as an adult.) He's a protector/caretaker (in my original post i said caretaker, but he may actually be a protector idk.) and VERY overprotective of all of us, but he's especially overprotective of his daughter, Freyja, whom he adopted and named. He uses He/Him, and doesn't really have any specific interests as of right now, other than literature.

Freyja, the afforementioned adopted daughter of Armesos. She's 7-8 and Armesos doesn't want her online at her age, so she won't post. She's very nice though, if she posted I'm sure people on here would like her. Not much else to say, but she likes minecraft so yeah. Also she uses She/Her.

Popee, a fictive of Popee from the 2001 Japanese kids show Popee The Performer. Uses She/They/He btw. One of the main fronters in the system. Uhh he really really likes the backrooms, bojack horseman, rupauls drag race,and smiling friends. He handles most of the social situations (like confrontation) for the system.

Asriel/As, a protector. Ageless + Nonhuman (semi-biblically accurate angel) Uses He/They/It, but doesn't really care about pronouns that much. Not much to say about them, they're kind of just here, since we don't get into a lot of situations that Asriel would need to front for. He doesn't really have any interests. He lives to protect us, which makes me feel a bit guilty cause I wish he would do things to benefit himself sometimes, but still I appreciate what he does. :)

Next will beee Hunter! He's a fictive of Hunter from The Owl House. Uses He/Him. He doesn't front much because when he does, he usually panics. A lot. He likes wolves, and human stuff. That sounds extremely vague, but remember that his source isn't human. Not much to say about him as of right now, hes very sweet though.

Now for ENA. She is kind of confusing. She's a fictive of the ENA character by Joel G. She uses She/Her, but doesn't mind any other pronouns. She is VERY similar to her source, in the way that she has very fast, aggressive mood changes, and when she's happy she speaks in a very formal manner. She seems to be a trauma holder? Not 100% sure right now though.

Next will be uhh Crittr, they use He/They/It! Basically the embodiment of the original weirdcore aesthetic, which is pretty interesting in my opinion. Like I said in the original intro, not much info on them, but yk.

Ok now for Kyle. Fictive of Kyle Broflovski from South Park, as previously mentioned. He's 10 so yeah, and uses He/Him. He just kinda does his own thing, idk, but he likes video games so yeah. He's pretty much the same as his source, personality wise and stuff.

Ooookay now Star/Stargirl. Uses She/Her, and is very very quiet. Not much to say about her. Not sure what kind of alter she is?? But she mainly watches over us and comforts us when we need it. So yay :)

Lastly(?) iiiis Apollo/Oliver! He's about 37 and uses He/Him, since he's very veery new I don't have much to say about him, but he's very sweet. He's like a (MUCH) older brother.

Ooookay yay ! That's the end! It literally took me like a day to write this out which is ridiculous but whatever. I work very slowly. Okay thank you for reading :)

-Max

New alter

Jan. 6th, 2023 11:02 am
stcculky: (Default)
I don't know how to work the icon thing so.. Sorry for using your icon, max. Anyways, hello? I'm Apollo. or Oliver, either name is fine w/ me. I don't have much else to say. I use he/him pronouns.

from, Apollo
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
So this is gonna be just a rant cause.. why not. but yeah.

We got off of winter break on Wednesday, and immediately we started testing. For the past three days, we've had to sit in a quiet room for 3 hours and test and it has been MISERABLE. What a way to start 2023, am i right? Plus, our schedule has been mixed up because of the testing so we have to go to our 3 worst classes today. It sucks. Being in those classes fills me with dread. It's also just been a bad week for us mental health wise. I won't go into details, and I wont say anything about other people's problems in the system, but I personally am just having a very hard week. I'm grieving because a few past alters went dormant, more specifically some of my closest friends within the system. I don't know when they'll come back, but I hope it's soon, because it's been lonely without them. I don't want this post to get too heavy so I'll stop with the sad stuff there.

I don't have much else to say, so I'll just end the post. Thanks for reading if you read that chunk of text.

-Popee
stcculky: picture of popee from the popee the performer manga (popee)
This is probably going to turn into a rant, but oh well.

Being a fictive kind of sucks- at least, when people know you exist, it does. A lot of people see fictives as somebody roleplaying a character they like, instead of somebody who IS that character. While technically, fictives aren't their source, we are still ourselves, not a roleplayer. Most people aren't familiar with fictives, or how they work, or even plurality in general. I understand that. But it's very unfortunate that sometimes I have to pretend to be somebody else because I know whoever I'm around would probably see me as a roleplayer instead of a person. I am a person. This is not a roleplay. I really exist.

What's more upsetting (more of annoying in my personal experience, but you get what I mean) is that some people aren't open to learning anything about fictives, nor systems in general. Of course, I don't want to force somebody to do hours of research or anything, but I do wish they would maybe ask questions about it if they were confused (which most people are, since systems aren't really talked about as much as they should be and things like that.) For example, one of Max's friends (who I talk to a lot, but she doesn't know it's me. She doesnt seem comfortable with our system because she is extremely uneducated about plurals.) who I'll call _, for the sake of privacy, and I got into a small debate about her refusal to learn anything about DID. Her argument was "Do I really have to learn about all of my friends disorders?" Which I understand not wanting to do, however the system does somewhat affect her too. Not as much as it affects us, (us = the system) however it still affects her. She has to be around us every day, wouldn't it be easier for everyone if she understood at least a little bit how it works?

I don't know, I don't have the energy to finish this right now. I guess I'll leave it off here for now. I'm sorry this turned into more of a rant that became more about alters in general instead of the actual topic of fictives, but oh well. I got carried away.


-Popee
stcculky: (Default)
So hi,this is my first post but uhh yeah!
So I'm Max, and I'm the host of a DID system (Technically the 'core' but a lot of systems Ive met more recently have said that core theory isn't true or right?)
Since this acc is going to be (probably) mainly about our system, I thought you could get to know us :)

Max (Me), Idk what to say? All of my interests and stuff are on my profile (idk how this website works so idk if y'all can see it.) but yeah im me i guess !

Popee, fictive of Popee from the 2001 Japanese show Popee The Performer created by Ryuji Masuda. Genderfluid and uses he/she/they. Has been in the system for almost a year now :D She is 17 btw, uhh not much else but she fronts very often and will probably post at some point. idk

Ametrine, role in the system is unknown???? she's 16, and pretty cool!! Currently uses She/They, but is still questioning her pronouns.

Freyja, a little (She's about 7 yrs old) Uses She/Her. Is the daughter of another alter (Armesos) but not biologically or anything. Been in the system 3-4 weeks? Probably wont post, as Armesos is overprotective of her.)

Armesos, a caretaker. His age is unknown but he is an adult. The adoptive father of Freyja as previously mentioned. Probably won't post on here.

Hunter, fictive of Hunter from The Owl House. 16 yrs old. Uses He/Him, Probably wont post since hes bad with technology and doesn't front much anyway.

Kyle, fictive of Kyle Broflovski from South Park. He's 10. Uses He/Him, might post idk he does his own thing when he fronts.

Asriel/As. Protector in the system, ageless and nonhuman. Uses He/They/It, but doesnt really care all that much about what pronouns you use for him. Probably wont post

Star/Stargirl, about 18. She/Her, doesn't really have a name but for now she's going by stargirl so yeah.

Crittr, He/They/It, ageless. Doesn't front much so they probably wont post much, or at all. Not much information on them since they don't say much anyways.

ENA. Fictive of the character by Joel G. Uses She/Her but doesn't care that much about what pronouns you use for her. Very similar to her source (ex: extreme, quick mood changes, formal manner of speech when happy.)

That's all of the alters as of right now. But yeah, expect some posts.

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stcculky

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